positive

(I couldn’t post this Friday…but I did write it Friday!)

Tuesday when I went to the bathroom, there was some spotting…and I thought that for the first time in three months my period was finally back to its normal thirty-day cycle.  But by Tuesday night the spotting had stopped.  On Wednesday, there was nothing.  I decided to take my temperature because I wanted to know when my period would start so that it wasn’t all, “surprise!  I just stained your light grey work pants!”, but instead of going down, my temperature had gone up (a drop in temperature is a sign of declining progesterone that signals the start of menstruation).  On Thursday, there was still no period, my temperature had gone up again, I hadn’t pooped in over five days (that’s even long for ME), and I was periodically dizzy and nauseous.  That’s when I knew that the spotting had been Implantation, and that I was probably pregnant.  Everything started coming together, and I remembered that on Tuesday night I had a dream that I took a pregnancy test and it was positive.  But even though my dreams have been eerily real in the past, I was afraid to take a pregnancy test because I didn’t want to see another negative test.

 This morning when I woke up I took my temperature again, and it had skyrocketed.  I felt fevered and like complete shit, so I peed on that dreaded stick…and this is what happened.

I immediately crossed myself and thanked God!  I didn’t cry, I didn’t scream, I just laughed!  I jumped up and down like a little girl and said, “Oh my goodness!”  and tried my best not to wake Tony.  At this point I had only peed on the digital test that read, “YES +”, so when I got to work I looked up the reviews on this test and realized that many people have taken this test and gotten false positives.  Great.  So I wouldn’t let myself believe it.  But I had stopped at the drugstore on the way to work to buy more tests because I knew I wanted to be sure, and so a couple hours later, I took the *second test…and, well…there you have it.  I have one test left, and I will probably take it in a few days just to be sure that I am still pregnant because I still can’t even believe it!  My first doctor visit is September 21st, and my due date is April 29, 2010.  My birthday.

 God continues to bless me in so many ways…

 We put our deposit down on our trip to Mexico and decided to take a break from trying to get pregnant the day after this little bean was conceived, and Tony said immediately after I called to tell him I would need his half of the money so that my checking account wouldn’t scream, “OVERDRAWN” , “watch, we probably got pregnant last night now that we’re paying for this trip”.  And I said, “No, I doubt it…my periods have been 35-38 day cycles for the past three months…there is no way I ovulated on time all of a sudden.  No worries…we’re going to Mexico in four months!”

 I usually hate it when Tony’s right…but not this time.

 I am the only one who knows about this pregnancy and it is KILLING ME!  I want to tell someone!  I want to celebrate it and YELL IT FROM THE ROOF OF THE HOSPITAL PARKING GARAGE!  But I can’t.  Because I need to tell Tony that he is going to be a daddy before I go running my mouth…or posting it on the internet.  You hear that Tony?  You’re going to be a DADDY!  And you are going to be so wonderful at it.  I wish you were reading this right now…

 …so after work I will try to find a fun way to tell him without scaring the shit out of him…I’m a little bit nervous. 

And WOW…it still doesn’t seem like it’s really happening.

*UPDATE: when I got home I took the 3rd test but when I looked at the test, my urine stream had MISSED (I would suck at peeing if I were a man)!  So I squeezed a couple little drops out and the pregnant line STILL came out before the control line AND darker.  If that weren’t enough, I went to my cousin’s house on Saturday and she had bought some $1 tests from the Dollar Store and I took one…definitely preggo.  Definitely.

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