Dear God,

Thank you for my lungs…breathing in and out is good even when I hold it in for longer than I should. You know, on account of my persistent need to attempt the stopping of time. You’d think I would learn after near-fainting that I don’t have power over such things…but alas, you made me…you know me.

Thank you for sending me into this world to people who have taught me love in its purest form: unconditional. Few are this fortunate, and possessing the knowledge to recognize the difference is a gift I’ll never fully understand receiving. I am so grateful.

Thank you for letting my heart be broken. If it had never been shattered, I would not know what it feels like for life to be breathed into it again. If the tears had not streamed my face and blinded me, the colors I now see would not be so purple and full of flavor. Laughter finds its way to me now without hesitation if only to surprise me over and over again. It’s a game I don’t mind losing.

Thank you for my mistakes. I know they are many, and they are breathtaking. Thank you for saying no so that I can bathe in the yes. Thank you for wrong places and wrong times. Without them, I would be lost in yesterday.

Thank you for words and their possibilities. Thank you for staffs and key signatures and eighth notes – a language that will take my length of life to master. I love every minute of it.

Thank you for the way rain sounds on a tent, and the way the smell of the seasons reminds me of moments almost forgotten.

Thank you for good-byes – the aching reminds me of love.
It reminds me of you.
I wish I remembered what you looked like before I was born…before you sent me here…

…thank you for giving me the faith to look forward to hello again