This is Guinness. Have you guys met him before? I don’t remember. Well, he is fat and sassy, and he likes to sunbathe. He’s actually just like his mom…he’s even constipated.

Cedomirka and me. The walls in my mother’s kitchen are really not this neon yellow color, but I discovered this weekend that my camera sucks. Or maybe I just suck at taking pictures with it because God didn’t grace me with the patience to read the owner’s manual.

However, I do thoroughly enjoy this picture of the Land of Deviled Eggs. My mom taught me how to make them, and I just wanted to dive into this picture and lap up the yolky goodness with my tongue like a wild cat.
Introducing Lazo the Lamb. He is dead and naked here, so we figured he was already humiliated so he wouldn’t mind if we cut off his front legs…

…and then we stuck a pole up his ass.

There is no order to these pictures just as there is no order in my life. It’s all a metaphor, you see. This is my dad’s church. This was in the middle of the night Saturday night. I took this picture from the choir loft where I sang songs in my head about how I would be on my best behavior if God would make church be over so that I could go to sleep. 4am is way past my bedtime.

Dinner in progress…