I will only eat Jif peanut butter. This is one of those things that I will not compromise. Oh, you are the man of my dreams, and you want to give me this wonderful life and make beautiful children with me? Awesome. You want me to eat Peter Pan peanut butter? Giant Eagle brand? Sorry…that’s a deal breaker. While we’re at it…other deal breakers include anything other than Coca Cola and Heinz ketchup. (Speaking of ketchup, do you Canadians realize that your ketchup tastes different up there?)

So back to Peanut Butter. Today at lunch, I finished off my little container of Jif, and I had another container half-full, so I opened the lid, stuck the spoon in, took a lick…..and it tasted different than the little bottle!! It tasted like Peanut SHELLS, not Peanut butter. The only thing I can come up with is this other container had been sitting on the shelf longer (I finished the new can first), and maybe it firmented? (Does Peanut Butter firment?) I couldn’t bring myself to eat a defected (defective? Yeah, I was an English major believe it or not) container of PB that tastes like pure nasty peanut shells (the whole reason I buy CREAMY PB is so I don’t have to deal with the crunch. But when it smells like shells, my brain thinks crunch.), so I gave it to my mom. Her nose is smaller, and she lacks nose buds (scent receptors, whatever).

Note To Self:

Eat old Jif before new Jif to avoid firmentation. The alternative is to remove scent receptors, and that’s just not an option right now.