Thank you for being such awesome parents! But seriously, you guys have completely made my relationship standards skyrocket, and now I can’t find a boyfriend! I’m not saying it’s your fault, but, well…it kind of is! Who gets married when they’re 19 and then can’t keep their eyes off each other when they’re 50?? All I have to say about that is, “Mom, those braces and wing-tipped glasses really must have been special.”

I love my parents more than I can even fathom…seriously, Readers…this is love, and I want nothing less.