I know Okay, Seriously is going to write about this today, but I must put in my two cents! I had the pleasure (?) of watching “Hit Me Baby One More Time” last night, where Vanilla Ice graced the stage with his presence. First of all, this guy still wears his baseball hat bill tilted up…you know, like those hats (in the late 80’s, early 90’s) that were different colors on the underside of the bill, so when you were cool and flipped it up, it would be bright orange? Or say something incredible like, “Dude”? In his defense, however, I must say…he’s still pretty damn hot. But gimme a break, people…he’s never going to have another hit besides “Ice Ice Baby”! Oh, and he did the whole knee-lift-arm-curl dance sans parachute pants, Tanks God!!

Rewind to before this display of 90’s excellence, and I was reciting my poetry at CSU’s Art Gallery to “interpretive movement”. Awesome. Actually, it was really kind of cool. I felt like the music and dancing really enhanced my piece…for the whole 5 people that attended who were NOT related to performers/poets/playwrights. Why does no one love the Arts in Cleveland?? Who wouldn’t want to watch barefoot dancers in black leotards dragging each other across hardwood floors, swaying back and forth to my poetry? C’mon, Cleveland! Get it together! Well, in the city’s defense, all the people were probably in puddles on their living room floors. Humidity is a bitch. I hate her so much.

Speaking of living room floors, I laid on mine next to Fern when I got home last night. It was imperative that I do this in order to inhale as much oxygen as possible. I was careful not to move so as not to exert any unnecessary energy. Any sudden movements, and I would have had to breathe in more oxygen, and seeing as how there was only moist heat hanging in the air of my death trap apartment, I didn’t want to tempt fate. Thank you, Fern, for saving my life.

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